My Dad

June 5th is my dad's 66th birthday and he has finally decided that after 44 years that he has decided to call it a career and has decided to retire from his job as a math department chairman. At the end of May my dad had a retirement dinner and I was so proud of him. Proud of the amount of love his staff had for him. He had been a Math Department Chairman at Hereford High School for 13 years and these were the people who were throwing him the dinner. Up to that point he had been a Middle School Math Department Chairman at about 3 to 4 other schools in his huge career. His staff had created a powerpoint of his 40 plus year career filled with music, pictures, and humor. Then his staff came up and everyone talked a little about what my dad meant to them. And this was interesting to me, because I never saw him as a school teacher. He never taught me, I never saw him interact with the kids in his class. But this outpouring of love was overwhelming and it was another side of my dad I have never seen. And then he did his speech. I never really expected him to be as eloquent a speech reader he was, but it should not have surprised me since he wrote a wonderful eulogy for his mother, my grandmother. But his speech was amazing. But after his dinner I was driving home and I started thinking about my dad. All the stuff he has gone through, all the stuff he has done for me and his family. He's made some mistakes, he's had some rough times and he had some good times. He's done some great travelling and has always stuck to a schedule. Goes to bed at 8pm. Gets up at 3am and runs for awhile, then goes into work, works all day, then gets home has dinner, does work, goes to bed. That seems to be his routine. The weekends he works, reads, runs, spends time with the family, or does whatever. And that is my dad in a nutshell. Very schedule oriented. Which is fine. I find myself sometimes dipping into that well and finding myself schedule oriented every once in awhile which I get from my dad. it's not often but sometimes it creeps out. Most of the time I am laid back as well.

So on this, his 66th birthday, and a few weeks before his retirement, I started to think up some of my memories of him and just wrote them down. I had so much written down that it surprised me how much I remembered when I have trouble remembering other bits of my life. Just goes to show you how important someone can be for you. So I thought I would just write a few rememberances for my dad. Not in any real order just off the cuff.

My Dad lost his father, my grandfather, at the age of 13. Being the oldest of 6 kids he had to take on the role of father figure for his siblings. It was rough but he was able to handle it while maintaining his schooling.

My Dad and Mom got seperated when I was about 14 or 15 and divorced after I turned 18, but it was an easy seperation on me and my sister. Meaning that my mother and father never fought in front of us, never moved us from one house to another, and were very cordial to each other in front of us. My Dad paid his alimony on time and never fought it. When my Mom's mother died, my Dad came down to the funeral and the wake and paid his respects to my grandfather, and when he passed my dad was down for that. It was both ways, my mom was there when my dad's mother died. They get along very well now and can be in the same place for family parties.  So if you ever need to get seperated the way my parents did it was perfect.

My Dad was the coach of my Little League baseball team for close to 5 years. That is not so unusual since lots of dads coach their children's teams, but since my dad is a math teacher and he loves his statistics. So he made statistics for us after every game and we loved it.

One year for my birthday, My Dad and I took a road trip to Chicago to go to Chicago Comic-Con. We got a room in the same hotel as the con, and while I was at the con my dad would lounge at the pool, or read, or whatever. Then in the evening we would explore Chicago. It was a long 12 hour drive to Chicago, and along 12 hour drive back, but at this age I could not drive so Dad took the wheel the whole time and we did not stop. While we were there we went to a Chicago White Sox baseball game, since the Cubs were away that week. We did not go into the Sears Tower, but did go into the John Hancock building which is just as tall. Ate some Chicago Style Pizza which is good. All in all a great time.

My Dad is a runner. He did races often and I would go to some of them. One father's day when I had grown up and was working for WLIF the radio station. We hosted a race and my dad ran it, so I got to see him and introduce him to the people I worked with and that was cool.

When I was younger during the last week of summer before school started for both Dad and I, I would go with my Dad a day or two to his work where he would be prepping for the school year. I would stamp school books, draw on his chalkboard, and generally just help my dad for a few hours. He would get me a soda which for me was huge.

My Dad loves Stevie Nicks, and when it came time that my sister and I thought we were ready for a real pet, we had to try and convince him to get a cat for us. We all wanted one, but he was kind of on the fence about it. But what is really great is that My sister and I came up with the perfect name. We told my Dad that we wanted to name our cat Gypsy, named after the song from Stevie Nicks. That convinced him and we got a cat. However, 5 years or so later my dad unfortunately was the one who found her lifeless body. She had been hit by a car, since she was an outdoor cat. Her lifeless body was right in front of my dad's car. And when he turned on his car and he turned on his headlights, he saw the body. And it crushed him.

My Dad always liked to travel and he has been all over. Europe multiple times, Canada multiple times, and has visited a lot of states in the United States as well. And when I was younger my family would go to Ocean City NJ where my mom's sister lived for our vacations. One year we all went to New York and Boston as well. After my parents seperated my dad more travelling and sometimes my sister and I would go along. We went to Boston again, flew to California and did LA, San Diego, and San Francisco. We flew to Seattle and did that and Vancouver, then back to San Francisco. And the last major trip I remember taking with my dad was flying to Denver, spending time there, driving to the Grand Tetons and Yellowstone, then driving back to Denver with a stopover in Boulder. All nice trips, all fun trips. My Dad takes my nephews on week's vacations as well nowadays. And he and my stepmom still do some travelling. In fact he will be going to Belgium this summer. So pretty cool.

Every year My Dad and I go to a Ravens football game together, with the exception of last year when he got me and my wife and sister and brother in law tickets to Ravens Vs. Redskins. But every year since the Ravens have been in existence we have gone to a game together. We went to the first ever Ravens Playoff game in their history on New Year's eve 2000. We also used to go to Orioles games together, but now not so much. In fact we went to the very last game at Memorial Stadium for the Orioles, before they moved to Camden Yards. We used to go see the Bullets/Wizards when they would sometimes play a game in Baltimore, which they haven't done in years. So it is always a lot of fun when my dad and I do these things together.

My Dad started my Comic Book collection and got me interested in comics. We've watched movies together just the two of us. We saw Midnight Run, Every Which Way but Loose, The Maltese Falcon, and probably more that I can't remember. He loves his grandkids and is looking forward to spending time with them now that he is retired.

I love my Dad. I am lucky that I feel that he loves me too. I am lucky for all the time I have spent with him and will spend with him for many years. We may not talk everyday, but I know my dad is concerned for me and my family and I am lucky that I have this relationship with my Dad. I hear horror stories about people having strained relations with their father, and am so happy that I do not have this problem. Dad I love you and I hope I did not embarass you too much. As proof of how great my dad is. I am posting the last three minutes of his Retirement Speech. in my opinion they were the best part of the speech.   Happy Birthday Dad! Happy Retirement! And I will definitly talk to you soon. Love Dylan.

 

Smoke Signals: Birthday Edition

Welcome to another fun filled edition of Smoke Signals, my micro blogging within a blog series. Today I will be doing some quick and random looks back at my previous birthdays. Since today June 20th is my birthday.

- At Hanover Uniform where I work it is always a fun filled birthday, filled with cake, singing, and cards. And today no Ridgeway!!

-I love my birthday because every 4 years it is the first day of summer (like today) and every once in a while it is father's day. I am also on the cusp of Gemini and Cancer which is pretty odd since Gemini' s are pretty outgoing and Cancer likes to be left alone. So now you know why I am screwed up.

-My Grandmother Parks passed away in I guess it was 1998, her funeral was the day before my birthday. It's not the only time she pulled something like that. On my 21st birthday she had to have a triple bypass operation. So thanks Grandma. (Kidding, she knows it to)

-When I was younger we used to pick what movie we wanted to see in the movie theater. One year I picked:

Over:

Yep I was an idiot when I was younger.

-I also watched Howard the Duck one year also as well. So nyahh!

-When I was younger I remember going to Orioles games around my birthday as well. One year I went when they were still at 33rd street and I remember trying to get Elrod Hendricks' autograph but he had to get to the bullpen but he invited me to come to the Orioles Club after the game and he would sign whatever I wanted. I never went.

-I always felt lucky that my birthday was in the Summer because in College we used to have a tradition where your friends would carry you to the campus pond and throw you in. My friends never had a chance. My friends whose birthday's were in the winter, we did it. One year we even iced someone when the pond was frozen over. Nice.

-One of the best birthday's I ever had was in 2010, it was actually the day before my birthday but it was still great. I took Noelle to see her first theatrical show. It was a live action version of 4 episodes of some of her favorite Nick Jr. Shows, Dora, Wonder Pets, The Backyardigans, and Ni-hao Ki Lan. We went to the Hippodrome just the 2 of us. While we were out, my wife set up a surprise party for me and I had lots of family up, including my sister and Brother in law and nephews.  Needless to say I was surprised. We had BBQ from Andy Nelson's. For dinner, my daughter and I went to Arby's to get food and that was great. That night the wife and I celebrated in our own way (nudge Nudge Wink Wink Say no more). The next day was Father's day and my actual birthday and we went down to my in laws and that was fun as well.

-I had my fair share of parties at my house. I don't recall ever going anywhere special for my birthday when I was younger. But I could be wrong. When I was older, Dawn took me to a Japanese steak house and surprised me with a little party there. That was cool as well.

-On my 30th Birthday, my mom and Dawn set up a party for me and some friends at the Stoneleigh Bowling alley. It was one of the only times I got to see my Rainforest Cafe Friends Ellyn, Jeanette, and I think Kim was in there as well who came to my party. That was fun.

-For Valentine's day my wife got me flowers, but I kind of recall that when I worked at Diamond, she used to get me flowers for my birthday and that was always a nice treat.

I'm sure I am forgetting some things but that is all I can recall at this time. Good Times.

You sure have gotten Fat Dylan

My Grandmother passed away on May 12th, a day before Mother's Day. She was 86 years old. She had not been doing that well and to be honest it was not a huge surprise. It appeared to most of us that she was waiting for all her children, (all 6 of them) to get together from the different parts of the US they lived in. Once they did they all said their goodbyes and she passed away the next day. A lovely funeral occured on May 16th and she was finally laid to rest to reunite with my grandfather, whom I never I met since he died when my dad, who is the oldest child turned 13. My Uncle Frank who is the youngest was only 1 year old when his father passed away. My grandmother never remarried though she had an interesting relationship with Father Smith a pastor friend of the family. Who passed away from Prostate cancer 3 years ago.

I've never been one to have real close relationships with my grandparents. We went to visit them often but most times I was busy with my cousins or sister or being by myself. So I never really got to know them I guess. I mean I knew alot about them but I never really sat down and just spent a lot of time with them. Do I regret it, maybe a little bit, but to me it did not seem that big of a deal. I loved my grandparents, but I never went out of my way to spend time with them, and I guess that could make me an ungrateful grandchild. But i did visit them when my parents went to see them, I just very rarely went off and spent time with them myself.

With my Grandmother Lange who just passed it was a little easy to not visit since she had 6 children who in turn 4 all had families. I have 10 cousins that range in age from 36 (I think) to about 20ish I would say. Whenever we all got together at my Grandma's house or any of my Uncle and Aunts houses the cousins all went off on their own and played various things. One of the big things we played when I was younger was Indiana Jones. Quite the experience, and can be it's own blog posting someday.

Fourth of July was our big holiday. We always got together on 4th of July (or as close as we could get it) and had a really nice picnic which included our annual games of Badminton, something that had been going on in the family since my dad was a young man. We also had some horseshoes and Bocce Ball at times as well. But badminton was our game, and I like to feel having that experience encouraged me to try out for my High School Badminton team which was a Varsity sport and in which I played for 4 years with one of the best teams in Baltimore County. Thanksgiving seemed to be big as well, but I always ended up going to my other grandparents house and then to my wife's family's house. Once in awhile we were there for Thanksgiving, and I heard after the dinner there was rough and tumble Poker going on, which I never played. We always also found ourselves at her house usually on Christmas Day as well. So each time I would end up playing with my cousins while my aunts and uncles all sat around chatting.

One year I went to the OBX with my Grandmother. The majority of her family was down there and the very first time I ever went to OBX was with them. A good amount of my cousins and my aunts and uncles were there and it was a blast. Before we left for OBX I spent the night at my grandmother's house and drove down with her and Father Smith. I think that was the only time that I remember being with her for any length of time and it wasnt even just the 2 of us since Father Smith was driving. At the beach I spent all my time with my cousins again.

The only other time I really remember visiting her when it was just her was when Dawn and I took Noelle over for a visit. At this time Noelle was a baby and my grandmother loved it. I always wanted to take her and Noah to see her but things just never came together for whatever reason, possibly from the fact that I never really spent much time with my grandmother.

Finally the reason for the title of the blog. Dawn and I got married in October 2003, that Christmas we went to my Uncle Phillip's and I remember distinctly after hugging my grandmother she looked at me and said Boy Dylan you sure have gotten fat. Now my grandmother was always one to never hold her tongue on anything and my shocked look on my face must've startled her because she then added it was a compliment, I meant it looks like married life has been good for you. Sure you were Grandma, but I still loved you. It is a memory I will have of you and I can laugh about it now because I do not think my grandmother was trying to be insulting, I think she really believed she was complimenting me. And yes I was a little chunky since my job at the time was to sit at a desk for 8 hrs a day on the phone with customers and I exercised very little but drank lots of soda and ate lots of snacks.

Are there regrets? Sure. I always wanted to learn more about the Scottish Castle that she inherited then gave away, I discovered she worked for the FBI when I was at her funeral, never knew that. I wouldve liked to hear more stories about my grandfather, my dad has some but he was 13 when grandad died so I would've liked to hear more from Grandma. I'd like to know how she was able to raise 6 kids practically on her own. I'd like to know how she was able to afford 6 kids when I don't even remember her working, and even if she was working who looked after the kids? I know my dad was a surrogate father for them, but still it would've been fascinating. I would like her to know that I did love her though I was not the greatest grandson in the world, but she always got me something for Christmas and my birthday and even got stuff for Dawn and the kids as well. One thing I do not regret is that she lived long enough to see my children, and meet my wife and spend some time with her. I was not as lucky with my other grandparents since they passed away before I was married or had kids. So at least she was able to have 5 great grand kids (my sister's, mine, and my cousin Jenny are the only one with kids) she could spend time with. I know you are in a better place grandma. I love you.

Smoke Signals 2: Sports, Movies, SMG, and me

Welcome to Smoke Signals my mini blogger on my blog. Just a bunch of random thoughts I've had recently.

-My Facebook at work is not working, everyone else at work has working Facebook. I even downloaded Google Chrome to see if that helped. It didn't. Our IT guy was on my computer today. I wonder if he did something to it.

-As readers of my blog know, I have a crush on Sarah Michelle Gellar. Just found out she and her husband Freddie Prinze Jr. are expecting their 2nd child soon. Which may but the damper on a second season of Ringer. But for now who cares. Congratulations!

-The NFL draft started yesterday. The Ravens had the 29th pick overall. They ended up trading out of the first round for more draft picks. It makes sense, it makes real good sense, but I kind of wanted the Ravens to draft someone in the first round. I watched the whole thing waiting for it. In the end it was a good move and hopefully we will get some good players.

-The Baltimore Orioles who were projected to be a terrible team with at least 100 losses are now in a tie for first place. Now this doesn't really mean much right now since they tend to do good right out of the gate, liek last year they started 6-1 but soon started to fall badly. However this year seems to be different. Their pitching staff is pretty damn good. And they are getting the clutch hits they need. They are 5-1 against The Toronto Blue Jays who were supposed to be a good power this year. They are 0-3 against the Yankees and 1-2 against the Angels, so we shall see. May will be a big month for them. But now it is fun to watch this team.

-I have a zit. At the age of 38. WTF is up with that???

-My family pet Bonnie is not doing to good. She has not been eating alot the last 24 hours and threw up about 6 times last night. I still blame me letting her go out to eat grass. But she is old and she is showing it. Someday I will write a blog about my adopted cats Bonnie and Clyde. Just pray for her.

-Today April 27th is the last Friday before the Summer movie season starts. It's always seemed to be a weird movie day. Releasing a film a week before the first Summer Blockbuster knowing full well that you will be getting killed in your second week is always interesting to me. I will be writing a Summer Movie Rememberance blog sometime this summer. Should be fun.

-Maybe I will write it next weekend after I get back from the Mighty Marvel Movie Marathon. 6 Marvel Comics movies in order in one day, concluding with a midnight show of The Avengers. Starting at 1130am and going til about 230am. Should be interesting.

-I love watching my kids grow up and start to develop their personalities. I also see a lot of me in my kids. Recently Noelle started making up stories on her own and reading them to us. I used to do the same thing when I was a little older then her. In fact I wrote a lot of them down. I had written like 3 books, all about 33 pages long with illustrations, and my mother typed up some of my short stories and laminated them. I hope we can do something similar for Noelle.

That's it for now.